Dear mom dealing with anxiety and depression,
Let me start by saying, while your personal experience is unique, you are not alone.
I know how hard it is being the mom you want to be with anxiety and depression bearing down on you.
I know the lies they put in your head: That you’re a bad mom. That you’re damaging your kids. That they’d be better off without you.
I understand what it’s like to have little people depending on you, yet feeling like you can’t peel yourself out of bed, or off the couch, or into the sun. You probably wish you could go on that play date or take them to the park, but the idea of getting up, getting dressed and going out…there? It all feels too overwhelming.
Your exhaustion probably feels never ending. Your mind is constantly racing, worrying, thinking. You sleep at night, but never truly rest. And the fatigue leaves you feeling more stressed out.
The thing about mental illness is that it’s hard. And it’s a struggle many people don’t understand because they can’t see it. There’s no fever, no cough, no broken bones.
I get it.
I know it’s hard to believe, but mental illness lies – often. Sometimes it’s hard for me to remember the good moments when I’m in the midst of the bad. Those moments when I see my kids smile or hear them laugh. Those times when they tell me they love me.
Feeling like you’ve hit rock bottom has a way of making you forget how it feels to feel “normal.”
The thing I’ve found while dealing with mental illness is that my life is a journey of being down and up and down again.
But right now I’m in a good place so I can tell you this: It gets better. It may not seem like it now, but it will.
There will still be rough days, but I’m learning to stop anticipating them an just relishing in the times where I feel good, and happy, and “normal.”
Dear struggling mom, I just want to tell you to keep fighting. Do what you need to do to take care of yourself. Your children will understand the days that you were tired. Their world will not end if you can’t bring yourself to go to that kid’s birthday party. They won’t be damaged if you need a babysitter to get a little break. Your babies love you. Your babies need you.
The fact that you even find yourself worrying about these things shows what a phenomenal mom you already are.
And on those days when you feel like no one gets you, just know that I do.
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